5 reasons why small business is a joke

In the land of opportunity (and beyond) the entrepreneur is a beacon of hope for today’s generation, where economic instability and unused college degrees are now the norm. WAHMs, Mom-and-Pops and the rest of us business owners have an obligation to show off our can-do attitudes the best way we can.

But for the most part, we are not succeeding. Not one bit.

It isn’t because we have exhausted all of our money or time, either. It’s not because big government has red-taped us to death, either. We, fellow business owners, are our own worst enemies, and our own source of jokes, too. Who needs Comedy Central, when we have each other? :)

You think I’m kidding about us kidding ourselves? Small business is laughable because of these five reasons:

1. You chose to add music on your webpage, but you’re not a musician. I get it, nobody ever told you that your music is unprofessional and annoying. Most visitors to your site either mute the tunes (which is nicely on auto pilot for our listening convenience…ha!) or sit through the sounds and wonder “what’s the point”?

2. You’ve abandoned social networking, but you’re an internet-based company. Somehow, the social media fairy failed to pay your business a visit, or your child is learning about labor laws and has now resigned as your Facebook go-to person. With sites like Hootsuite or Seesmic to help you post to multiple accounts and schedule messages to share in the future, there is no excuse for having the last post on your business page read, “Happy 2011”. Yes, I mean 2011.

3. You’ve added bright, bizarre colors on your webpage, but you’re not a fashion designer. Have you ever watched a red carpet event for any given awards show, and thought “what was Nicki Minaj thinking?” Now apply the same thought for potential customers who visit your site. Standing out is not always a great way to promote your brand.

4. You’re networking, speaking, coaching, but not making any money.
You know who you are. Repeating all the free information, repackaging it and placing a  bow — your logo — on top of it. Admit it, you just want to hear your own voice.

5. You’re site is “currently under construction”, but…c’mon, it’s been three months!
I understand. You haven’t gotten around to working on the site because: the designer is slow, the kids are hungry, the “vision” isn’t there. Fair enough, now let’s disable the site until you’ve managed to run out of excuses resolved the issues.

Customers want to support us, they are at least contacting us, yes? There is also the potential for joint ventures and the chance of seeing your products on sale at Wal Mart, but we are missing out on it all.  We are gaining more punchlines than opportunities. Sad.

Got funnies? In what other ways is small business a joke?

image source: cartoonresource.com


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4 thoughts on “5 reasons why small business is a joke

  1. I like this article. I think that many things are subjective to the business owner and how they feel about the image that they want to portray. One item that applies to me specifically is having music on the site. My site http://www.LadyBizness.com does have music, but that’s because I want it there. I have made plenty of changes to my site and that is one comment that people either like it or not.

    The most important thing that I thought was in this article was the explanation of owners that do not use social media to the fullest extent. We have got to understand our consumers and know that they are all over the Internet and we should be too. However, be there with a clear purpose and a consistent image. #BiznessBranding

    1. Thanks Chisa. What we have to decide, as business owners, is which is more important: what we want or what our customers want. I don’t know if every client I work with wants to hear music (in their office or the comforts of home). Scratch that…I doubt that any client I work with would care to hear house music. :)

      And it is straight house, not that watered-down Rhianna/Pitbull club stuff the kids listen to these days.

      It’s my writing biz, but it’s not about me.

      But I’m glad you agree that clear and concise messages in social media campaigns always win.

      Thanks again for your comment.

  2. Pingback: business jokes

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